Basic Instinct

I have always been told by my Mother that I an very intuitive. As a child I was very popular because of my ability to connect with virtually anyone I meet. This behavior has actually led into my adult life, so much so that my bestfriend Danielle always remarks how I can "get along with anyone."

The secret to being able to "get along with anyone" is to trust your instincts about the person, and believe that they are the best person you have ever met. Its not act that I perform, its what I truly think of the people that I know in this world-- Really.. no lie.. I wouldn't bother with people I know, if I had thought that they weren't. Of course, there are times, when I don't get along with people, but thats usually because they aren't what I consider good people or because they have hurt me in some way.

You have to be wondering why I am telling you this?

Well, the guy I was "Seeing" is the newest member of the Island of Lost Men (please read my previous blog to get the definition). To say that I am disappointed, wouldn't be accurate, but I am definitely wondering why I didn't listen to my Basic Instincts.

My Instincts have always guided me in the right direction in every situation. So, why, when it comes to romance, I constantly make the wrong decisions.

Yesterday I tried to end the situation with the guy I was seeing, because I had a gut feeling he wasn't feeling "us" anymore. I wrote him an IM, telling him that I couldn't make it to our gathering yesterday and that I would just talk to him some other time. However, he wouldn't let me. He told me that he wanted to get together with me and wanted to hang out and have fun. I fell for it- just as I have done in the past. Instead of listening to my gut and my mind, and my BASIC INSTINCTS, I set up myself up for failure once again.

My friends have all told me some valuable information about myself. They have told me how I tend to jump in with both feet when I meet someone I like, and how just as quickly I jump right out. They have mentioned to me how I tend to change in behavior once I become intimate with someone. More importantly, they tell me that I need to RELAX and not expect so much when I meet a guy who I think is cute.

I can't help but think that they are SO right about all these things.. However, I also can't help but wonder if I just left everything up to my basic instincts, my ego wouldn't be brused right now.. I know for certain that I wouldn't be sitting here typing this blog right now, feeling badly about being stood up, and wondering if I am even worthy of finding true love.

How do I prevent this from continuously happening to me?