The Mirror Has Two Faces.....

When I was in Highschool, I befriended these identical twins. Both girls, at the time we were friends, were lovely women, and seemed to be able to balance the massive amount of attention they received for being the only twins at our school.

However, as I started to become closer to one of the girls, I realized this wasn't such an easy task for them to accomplish. My friend described to me how people would marvel at them as if they lived in some kind of bubble. She would describe to me how difficult it was to make "real" friends, and even told me a disturbing story of how after school one day when she was in 1st grade, she stood in the mirror and screamed "I'm NOT TARA OR SARA, I'M NOT TARA OR SARA".

This story has haunted me ever since she was brave enough to share it with me.

For the first time, I believe I know why.

Lately, I have been "seeing" this Minister, and while things are going ok, they certainly can be going better.

I feel like there is a part of me that I am holding back from him. It feels like as if I am being one person with him, but a slightly different person when he isn't around.

For instance: Tonight, when we tried to finalize plans of when we will get together, I acted cool, suave, and very laid back about the situation.

However, what was going through my mind was "MAKE A F**KING DECISION". Its isn't like its rocket science-- figure out when you have time!"

Ugh..

I realize dating requires much patience, but how much do you really need to have before you become in danger of losing grip of your identity and/or the situation at hand?